Disappointed Once Again

The ex of all exes really knows how to push my buttons.  Just when I thought he was getting his act together and stepping up to the plate, he throws a curve ball and pisses the living shit out of me once again.

I’m not sure what it is going to take for me to stop being disappointed by his actions, but it still hurts.  It hurts to the point where it makes tears swell up in my eyes.  I know I have done so much to help him, support him through the toughest times he has had and when he lets me down by backing out of something he said he would do, it rips at my heart.  It feels so disrespectful and I’m not sure how someone that has taken so much from me could do that.  There is simply no regard for me in his eyes.  I wish I could blow him off, never help him again, but I know, the minute he comes crawling back to me in need of something, I won’t have the heart to deny him.

Why am I so weak?  How can one person have such an effect on me?  Someone…please save me from this lopsided relationship!

Ray

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