Being scared to plan

As I mentioned in one of my last posts, the Newbie and I have talked extensively about me having this need to plan and him having this need to be spontaneous. The thing I’m having the biggest problem with at this point is that I am sometimes scared to ask him in advance to do something. I know it stresses him out and that makes me incredibly hesitant to ask him to put something on his calendar.

I’ve told him it makes me scared to ask and he has assured me that I should not feel that way. I still do though!  So how can I get over that? Have you ever dealt with a similar situation? I know it’s not healthy to be scared to ask your BF to do something…so I need some good tips!!!  Help me…

Ray

Getting Ready for the Fall

Last week I talked about my favorite fall activity, street festivals. This week, we shall discuss my second favorite. My second favorite fall activity is hibernation. Ladies and gentlemen, I’m starting to switch my summer gear for warmer duds. My clothes and home decor are flying south for the winter aka under my bed and into storage. Also changing is my mindset: OUT WITH SUMMER, IN WITH FALL!

I enjoy fall the most because it’s just a tad cold enough for a light jacket but you can still look stylish under all those layers. Besides the clothes, who doesn’t love waking up to crisper air while warmly snuggled in your comforter? Then, when you finally crawl out from your deep abyss, you can trot on over to your local coffee shop for pumpkin flavored deliciousness. Hmm, yum.

Think of all the fun you can have as the weather gets cooler. Here’s my list to keep me happy and sane as the warmth leaves us:

  1. Pumpkin spiced chai
  2. Apple picking
  3. Pumpkin picking
  4. Pumpkin craving
  5. Pumpkin smashing!
  6. Pie: Apple or Pumpkin variety
  7. Red wine by a fireplace
  8. Halloween candy
  9. Haunted house tours
  10. Knitted hats (I look adorable)

What are some of your favorite things for the fall?

Stay warm people,
J

Building the Relationship

The Newbie and I have had numerous discussions within the past two months. We have hashed out several things that I have been holding onto for months (lots of months)! I just wanted to take this time to mention a couple of things that I had been holding in and never brought up with him.

1.  The lack of planning- this has been an ongoing issue. It’s just not his style to plan things in advance and its not my style to be spontaneous. So we are both working on doing the opposite thing as a compromise. My way of being spontaneous is to ask the day of to see him and be prepared to spend the night with stuff for the next day in my car! It’s a step in the right direction…but I’m still “planning” it, he just doesn’t know it.

2.  Not spending time with friends/family- he has started to do more stuff with my friends and has finally met both my Mom and Dad. It does bother me that he hasn’t really brought me around his family. He confided in me that he just isn’t that close with his Mom and doesn’t necessarily enjoy spending time with her so doesn’t want to bring me around that situation. He doesn’t see the rest of his family often.He knows it is important to me for him to spend time with my family/friends and vice versa so is going to start including me more and continue to spend more time with my friends/family.

It was definitely putting a strain on our relationship because I couldn’t be honest with him or myself. It made me grumpy and I was taking it out on him. At this point in my life, I’ve come to the realize there is no point in not bring the issues up….I urge everyone to start being honest with their feelings if they haven’t been. Have you held things in before and wish you hadn’t?  I mean really…what good does that do for anyone????

Ray

H Street Festival 2012

If you’ve never visited DC before, I personally think the best time to visit is now. Right now, the weather is cooler than our hot and humid weather of summer. This is really the best time to see DC and all of the fun that can be hand, if you know where to look. Plus, it’s festival time in DC! Many communities and neighborhoods in the area host a block party, festival, a day celebrating each ‘hoods diversity, culture, or general mayhem.

This weekend I had the pleasure of celebrating H Street’s revival. Well I got to the party a little later than intended but H Street didn’t disappoint. It was crowded but the weather was lovely which I think makes it a fair trade. (If you’ve experienced DC between June-early October, you know how humid it could be.) It was a lot more crowded than it has been in the past couple of years I’ve attended but hey, that just means that neighborhood is thriving right? Or people really didn’t have plans for the weekend, whatever.

There are so many things to entertain yourself with at festivals like this. It’s a few blocks of vendors selling food, drinks, clothing, and other wares. Also great, is that nonprofits or community groups can also share their information throughout the festival. There is live music, games, and fun involved. My friend and I checked out the Baltimore Rock Opera for their BROlympics. It was pretty epic, high energy show and hilarious to boot. Air guitar ROCK ON!

We then proceed to get drinks at Smith Commons and hang out on the roof deck. Best part, besides the drinking, was that we got to hear the show happening at the CraftClubHouse, also hosted by Smith Commons. From what I could see that area had beer, food, and featured local talent. The music was amazing and the beers didn’t hurt either.

All in all, I love festivals and I can’t wait to hang out at the next one. Cheers Friends!

J

Happy Hour at Mellow Mushroom

Mellow Mushroom- 2436 18th Street NW

We haven’t done a Happy Hour blog post in a while.  This week we decided to hit up Adam’s Morgan which was a nice change in location.  AM was our spot back in the day after college….it’s always different to be there when it is still light outside.

Mellow Mushroom has a rooftop deck which was awesome to hit up with the great weather we have been having in the DMV region.  They have a limited selection of draft beers on the rooftop, but enough options for both of us to be happy.  One of the draft beers was discounted for happy hour and they had a couple of appetizers that were also on the happy hour menu!

J and I decided to split a small pizza.  We got the red skin potato one which was good, but we both looked back at our decision wishing we went with something more standard aka cheese/pepperoni.  The wait staff was great and informed us they are expanding in the region (adding 5 more restaurants within the next year or so)!  Definitely worth a try, especially when the weather is still nice!

Ray

Funny Moments of Life

I recently caught up with a friend who I have not seen in quite a few years. It’s amazing how quickly we can grow and mature. We talked about the different paths we took after college and where that’s lead us. (Technically, it has led us both to DC.)
She has spent the last 3 years working on her relationship with herself. She moved around quite a bit from the east coast to Denver and later to Portland and spent her time finding herself. She told me she worked on figuring how what made her happy, upset, sad, etc. I think that’s an interesting approach–figuring out what makes you tick. I mean, no one is going to love you as much as you love yourself, right?  However, she did mention that the one thing she has neglected is how she works in relationships with other people. Well, my dear, I’ve been working on how I function with other people for years. I’ve been in relationships for such a long time that I know what my emotional triggers are in relationships.
In a bit of a role reversal, in the past year, I’ve been working on myself–learning how to be alone and alive. She has been in a relationship the last half of the year, her first in several years and boy, has this year been a wake up call for the both us. I think we’ll spend the rest of our lives finding a good balance between loving oneself and having others love you.
How do you balance things? Have you learned the way?
J

Planning a Bachelorette Party

I had the task of planning my College BFF’s bachelorette party.  Planning a weekend trip for a group of girls I don’t really know made me extremely nervous.  I wanted it to be a good weekend that everyone could enjoy so I planned the crap out of it!  The college BFF wanted a good mix of Charleston (downtown, out, relaxing, beach, etc).  We also had to fit in a cake tasting and dress fitting to make the most of her time in the city where she is getting married.

Along with the schedule that I worked on with the college BFF’s input, I wanted to bring goodies for everyone.  I made shirts that had a big wedding ring on them and a different “wedding” word (ie: love, romance, i do, ever after, etc.)!  I also created goodie bags in cooler cups- light up rings, leis, beads, lip gloss, nail polish, advil and sunglasses.

The plan was as follows….

Day 1

  • Check into downtown Charleston Hotel
  • Walk around downtown Charleston- window shopping, the market, harbor
  • Happy Hour downtown
  • Back to hotel to get ready for dinner
  • Dinner at SNOB
  • Out in downtown Charleston

Day 2

  • Early lunch and cake tasting at 26 Divine- they had the most memorable baked avocado with a goat cheese, corn, red pepper mixture on top…delish!
  • Beach time at Sullivan’s Island
  • Dinner at Poe’s
  • Drinks and games at the Hotel- lingerie party (everyone bought her a gift and she had to guess who got her which items), sexy zoo, box game, newlyweds game (had the husband to be answer questions and then hilary had to guess what his answers were), how well do you know the bachelorette (card game bought from Party City)

Day 3

  • Dress fitting
  • Visit family
  • Lunch on the way out of town

Everything went very well!  No girl drama, lots of wine consumed and a good weekend of fun!!!!  For my first time planning a bachelorette weekend, I think I did a fairly good job!  Who’s next?!?!

Ray