Still Burning About an Ex

At brunch this past weekend, I caught up with a friend. We obviously discussed my dating adventures, in particular we talked about a mutual friend I had dated earlier this year. I thought I had moved past my anger and hurt but really, I’ve just hidden it all away. Who says girls are good with their feelings?

I met this man as part of my study aboard trip years ago. We were mutually attracted to one another but one of us always had a significant other and timing never quite worked out. (Typical!) Well, 3 years later he visited me for a weekend. We ended up talking about our feelings but at the time, I wasn’t in the right place to pursue anything  further. Flash forward, he asked me out in the sweetest way possible. Given that we live in different cities, he found time to visit me every few weeks in between his grad classes and work. Obviously, we had a lot of chemistry, friendship, and mutual respect for one another.

Well, that suddenly changed. A few days after I visited him, he stopped calling. Uh what? That’s right ladies, homeboy stopped talking to me. I was pissed. I mean REALLY MAD. Here’s why–I’m not a random girl he met out one night, I had been his friend for several years and, if he wasn’t into it, maybe he should have communicated to me. I deserved a lot more than that. Anyway, this summer, he tried to meet up with me at a concert he knew I was attending to talk to me about what happened. I’m sorry but heck no. Well, I thought I had moved  away from my anger about this whole situation but really I’m still pretty mad at him.

Now, I know what you’re thinking…I don’t ever have to talk to him again. Well, here’s the kicker–our mutual friends and I host a reunion every year and we’ll have to see each other and interact because there’s only 4 of us. My concern is that I’ll give him the cold shoulder and make things weird for our friends. I’m hoping that by the time the reunion rolls around, I’ll be over it completely and have forgiven him but…probably not.

J

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2 thoughts on “Still Burning About an Ex

  1. Men can be really poor communicators sometimes. When he suddenly stopped calling, I’m sure he still cared about you and valued you as a friend..he just couldn’t articulate what he was feeling at the time. He defaulted to the simpliest route: avoidence. If you run into him again, just be friendly and cordial. No need to rehash the past.

    – K.

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