Why Can’t we Just be Friends?

As you know, back in November the Ex of All Exes pushed me out of his life completely because he could not imagine me being with someone else and us being just friends.  Weird, since for the past year, we had really been just friends.  Of course we were super close….we bickered like an old married couple, I would do anything for him (not sure if it went both ways), and we both relied on each other as the person to call when we needed a major vent session.

Well a lot has happened over these past 4 months.  I broke things off with the Newbie and started dating the Penguin and even BIGGER than that, I am buying my very first home.  It’s a huge step in my life and 4 months ago, he would have been on my top 10 list to call as soon as I heard they were accepting my offer.  But he wasn’t.  He clearly told me back in November that we just couldn’t be friends at this time and hopefully later on he would be able to accept just being friends.

So basically, in my mind, the ball has been in his court to reach out to me to rebuild the relationship.  I’ve told everyone in my life that even though we aren’t close now, I have no doubt in my mind we will always be friends…that we will find our way back into each others lives…and it is funny how something like moving out and BUYING A HOUSE will do that.

He saw a picture my sister posted on facebook about their “new neighbors” and he texted me inquiring if I was moving with them.  We chatted back and forth for a bit…and he mentioned that just because we don’t talk much, doesn’t mean he doesn’t care.  He sure has a funny way of showing that he cares when he blows off our lunch plans and doesn’t make any effort to be my friend.  I didn’t tell him that I was buying a condo…just that I was moving to DC.  I figure, I want to hold onto this little nugget of success just a little bit longer. Might be nice to tell him in person.

So we will see.  He said he wanted to get together and that he wants to be friends forever. I’m just not sure if I’m ready to be let down by him again.  I have some amazing friends and family in my life that I value and I want him to be one of them, but the difference between him and my current support group….they respect me, my time and make an effort to have a two way friendship.



One thought on “Why Can’t we Just be Friends?

  1. That’s sad 😦 I’ve been in a similar situation and it’s worth taking into account how he must feel. Maybe he still has unresolved feelings for you? I remember how it felt when my ex moved on. It hurt a lot to see them together and seeing him happy and knowing it wasn’t because of me anymore probably hurt the most. It was selfish, I know, but that’s how I thought before. We’re still friends, my ex and I, but I get what you mean about not liking the one-way friendship. Maybe he just doesn’t know how much he’s supposed to express how much he cares without you being weirded out by it? My ex once told me that he found it weird how much I cared for him even though at that point, I really didn’t have anymore romantic feelings for him. Haha.

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