Stop Asking Me!! (An Open Letter)

Dear Man-who-I-thought-was-cute-but-is-starting-to-creep-me-out,

I have not replied to your text messages or phone calls. It’s been over a month since we met. I didn’t follow up then, I am not going to follow up now. I have told you both on the phone and through text message that I do NOT want to date you or see you. Let’s take a hint. I am not interested.

Thus, for the love of life, PLEASE stop with the text messages. Am I busy right now? Yes, yes I am busy. I’m busy with my friends. I’m busy with my life. And I am VERY busy ignoring you. Do I have plans tonight? YES! Yes, I have major plans. I plan on washing my hair for the rest of my life.

Please stop. You are borderline scaring me. I don’t know what else to say to you. I have told you blatantly that we will never date. What more can I do to make you understand that you are creeping me out. You are too cute to be creepy. Stop. For the love of Harry Potter, STOP!

I’m begging you.

J