My Fears Around Being a Boss

When I started my new job, I became a boss.  I actually had someone reporting to me two jobs ago, but this seems different.  This time, I am running my own department.  I’m the head of the department with no one to go to except my CEO.  It was scary, but exciting all at the same time.

I’ve strived to be a good boss, someone that my employees appreciate in hopes that they won’t quit and go somewhere else.  One of the things my CEO stressed when I took the job was finding a way to keep my two employees happy and a part of the team.  I’m thinking about this more and more as the year is coming to a close because we will be having evaluations soon.

I hope my staff feel like they can discuss their roles and future freely with me.  Now that we have gone through an annual meeting together, I feel as if we have bonded which I believe helps in the communication.  I do feel as though I might need to grow some balls in order to communicate some of my feelings better.  Being a boss is tough!  I can’t be everyones best friend, but I sure do hope everyone likes me or at least isn’t talking a bunch of shit behind my back!!!!

Ray

Wedding Bells All Around

The Penguin and I had several weddings to attend this year.  It helps going to weddings to see what we do and don’t like.  Granted, we both have a fairly clear idea for our wedding plan, but it just solidifies what we want!

Do:

1. Hang out with your friends and family!  I want to spend as much time with everyone as possible.  We are planning to involve everyone in our Friday night activity (no sit down rehearsal dinner).

2.  Prepare our guests as much as possible.  Inform them we will be providing a shuttle and of all the pre/post wedding activities.

3. Open bar for the duration of the wedding…no stopping during dinner service!

Dont:

1.  First dances.  I find them awkward and uncomfortable.

2.  Cake!  Neither of us love cake, so why bother.

3.  Flowers won’t have a focal point at our wedding.  They die and I prefer to use things at the wedding that I can keep for the future.

Looking forward to the 2015 wedding season.  We have a Boston wedding, Turks and Caicos wedding and a Pittsburgh wedding (just to name a few).  Here are a few shots from three of the weddings we went to in 2014.  Love all the special touches each couple incorporated!

IMG_5693  IMG_5924IMG_5711

 

Ray

I Haven’t Found a New Work Bestie

I feel like after Annual Meeting I always bond and find my work best friend.  After this Annual Meeting, I don’t feel like I have found that 😦  I did bond and share some great memories with select staff members, but I don’t have a work bestie.  I’m just not sure it will happen for me with the group of people I am working with.

I feel like part of that is the role I am in.  I am the youngest person in an office so I feel like it is a little harder to bond with the people my age.  I suppose I don’t need a work best friend, but I do feel a little lost without one.

And on that note, I did not send save the dates to anyone at work.  I figured I would want to see how things progress before I send out invitations.  It might be tough to decide who to invite vs not.  Maybe just invite my boss and team?  That is three people and no one would judge me inviting just those people.  Or maybe I don’t invite anyone?  Decisions, decisions….I guess I still have some time since the wedding isn’t till September 2015!

Ray

Here comes the bride….

K-Ten/Penguin/My Sister/Brother in Law and I had bought tickets months ago to go up the Washington Monument at 6:00pm on August 9th.  The 4 of us arrived early via Uber so we decided to walk down to the World World 2 Memorial.  As we were walking past the Washington Monument, I was reading the back of the tickets and it specified no weapons, knives, explosives, etc.  We were discussing if we would have to go through a metal detector which might be an issue for my sister cause she likes to carry a pocket knife in her purse.  Guess to fend off all those crazy animals she sees out in the country.
The Penguin pushed the subject one more time which I blew off as irritating…like how do I know what we are going to have to do inside?!?!?!
We made the walk down and played tourist taking fun pictures if front of MD/PA/VA.  We started walking back up to the Washington Monument (K-Ten was texting as she was almost there and didn’t know where to meet us).  The Penguin wanted to take some pictures in front on the Washington Monument…weird because when does a guy ever want to take pictures?!?!?!  I was kinda suprised, but we all rotated around to take goofy ones.  The Penguin then said me/him should take a serious picture.  I leaned in and he made some odd movement, but leaned in as well to take a picture.  Then he dropped to one knee!
He said something along the lines of “Will you do me the honor and marry me.”  I responded “Are you kidding…awkward pause…YES.”  I proceeded to take the ring out of the box and then realized he should put it on so I handed it back to him and stared at the shinny diamond!  Some passers by offered their congrats (it was nice because a lot of people weren’t around us).  Sister/Brother in Law gave us hugs and then we had to hike it to the entrance because it was almost 6:00pm!
K-Ten came walking up to meet us (no idea anything had happened) and I shoved the ring into her face 🙂  It was pure happiness.
Typical questions I have been asked so will spare you…
1.  The Penguin did ask my Dad (at the check out line at Lowes a couple weeks ago)
2.  He has had the ring for about a month
3.  Only his mom and BFF knew he bought a ring, but didn’t know when he was proposing
4.  Sister/Brother in Law I had no idea
5.  I am hoping for a Septmber 2015 wedding
6.  Our guest list is currently 340 people which WILL NOT WORK because I cannot afford that shit
Be ready for some awesome posts as we navigate the wedding planning process.  My sister is already calling me a Bridezilla!!!!
Ray

2 More Years?

The other weekend, the Penguin made a comment that I was going to be waiting another 2 years for him to save up before proposing.  I was shocked!  Two years from today, makes me 29 and a half which means we wouldn’t be getting married until I am 30….I’m not that concerned about being married in my 30s, BUT I have a lot of other future plans that will then be conflicting.

1.  Trip to Africa for my 30th birthday

2.  Buying a new house after living in my current place for 5 years (age 31)

3.  The possibility of having children (age 32-34)…getting married at age 30 doesn’t leave a lot of marriage time before having a child!

4.  Other friends getting married!  I don’t want to have too many conflicting weddings!!!!

Mind you, the Penguin is 3 years older than me.  So if we get married when I’m 30, he will be 33 and then he will be in his late 30’s when kids come around (if we have kids) and that seems old!!!  I just don’t understand how it will take an additional 2 years before proposing!

Ray

 

Feeling Alone at Work

It has finally hit me that I do not have friends at work.  It’s starting to get a little sad and lonely.  I have no one to confide in or complain to.  I miss my friends from my old jobs.  I just keep reminding myself that I will make friends!  It is still early and it basically took me going to my first annual meeting at each job to form bonds with people.

My annual meeting here isn’t till November so I hope I might form some bonds before that, but we shall see.  I have a site visit in July which 6 staff members are going on so there could be some good bonding time then!  BUt right now I sit in my office, eating my lunch, writing blog posts.  Sad panda.

The thing that hurt the most was when my colleague (who works for me) asked if I was going to “this lunch thing.”  I responded, “no…what lunch thing?”  His response was, “Oh, that’s awkward, never mind” and he walked away.  I never figured it out.  It wasn’t on anyone’s calendar and it could have been a good bye lunch for someone’s last day, but it definitely made everything that much sadder.

There is a bright side…I got invited to dinner next week when some offsite co-workers are in town.  So that should be fun!  I might make friends after all 🙂

Ray

Death in the Office Place

How do you handle when one of your co-workers has a death in the family? Death is such a touchy subject and I know it is hard to comfort others because you just aren’t sure how people want to handle it.

I consider my co-worker to be one of my closest friends at the office, but for some reason it feels odd to jump up and give her a hug to console her.  Granted, I’m not a huger and she has a weird phobia of germs so I was at a loss when she came by my office to tell me the news.  I just sat in my chair, said how sorry I was and told her to let me know if I could do anything.  Its awkward and tough, but what else is one supposed to do?

Ray